tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1212890428051515494.post5407687428568387352..comments2024-03-19T09:47:02.249-05:00Comments on Say What?: Thoughts About My FatherKevin Gilmorehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07689287179985777963noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1212890428051515494.post-10799397441079416152013-01-17T12:45:55.349-06:002013-01-17T12:45:55.349-06:00Thanks for your kind words, Jason.Thanks for your kind words, Jason.Kevin Gilmorehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07689287179985777963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1212890428051515494.post-9222568730812200522013-01-17T09:21:27.888-06:002013-01-17T09:21:27.888-06:00I stumbled across this blog by accident and starte...I stumbled across this blog by accident and started to read thought on father and couldn't stop , Lovely expressive words, painted a real picture in my head.<br />good luck you and best wishes for your family<br />Jason<br />jasonharris1001@yahoo.co.uk<br />Bristol UKAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1212890428051515494.post-1270852170164209722008-06-17T15:53:00.000-05:002008-06-17T15:53:00.000-05:00I wonder what it does mean when we say we were not...I wonder what it does mean when we say we were not "close" with a parent(s). What does it mean to be "close" Does it mean that you call them each day? Does it mean that you talk to them about your day as a child? Does it mean that you never go without food, clothes or material wealth? Does it mean that you never suffer the consequences of your actions as a child, or as an adult? Does it mean they protect us from all that is wrong in this society? Does it mean that we can never say whats on our mind as they may not agree with us as. Therefore we have no mind of our own but rather always feel the need to keep peace. I'm not certain anymore what it means Kevin. To be close to Dad was different to me than it was to you. My feeling is that dad was very vulnerable and to show that vulnerability to his sons was to fearful for him. He never had a role model as a father so I understand the lack of fatherhood skills that he possesed. I really do not think that he ever quite felt he measured up to our expectations of him. Whatever they were. I know that being away from home a lot for his job did not help to cement the bond that the relationship seemed to lack. He would just get home, do the necessary things and he was off again. There was no importance placed on being home because Dad would be there. It was life as we knew it and it would really never change. The circumstances would but that's about all. I don't blame anyone for how things turned out. I honor him for what he tried to be and for the good he brought to my life and I feel sorrow for what he missed in his life and that would be to know his family as I truly think he wanted to. I believe he always wanted to be a good man. Sometimes he fell short but then so do we all. Thanks fort he memories. In my heart I know he loved us all.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1212890428051515494.post-33148400867343676692008-06-09T11:03:00.000-05:002008-06-09T11:03:00.000-05:00I've seen the video a number of times. Dad was at...I've seen the video a number of times. Dad was at his best during these family gatherings I think. I often wondered why Mom and Dad had six kids with all of the responsibility to feed and clothe them all. It may be that Dad needed what he really didn't have growing up, a family of his own.<BR/>More than the video was the associated audio which brings back a better image of that day at your place. I hear all of the voices that make it seem just like yesterday.<BR/>There has been a transition I think from the need to provide the essentials for a family at the cost of time spent with the kids and now the recognition that we all need more than food and a roof over our heads to be happy.<BR/>The thing we called "quality time" when my kids were growing up has become a common goal within most family units these days as opposed to something special or atypical. This is a good thing.<BR/>BryDavid Bryan Gilmorehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08954058198438593014noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1212890428051515494.post-91245675313347669732008-06-05T21:29:00.000-05:002008-06-05T21:29:00.000-05:00Tim,I agree with you that it seems to be a generat...Tim,<BR/><BR/>I agree with you that it seems to be a generational thing. I'd like to think that the younger generation won't be able to make the same claim when they're in our position. For sure some can and will. <BR/><BR/>Overall I think parents these days do a better job of not only communicating with their children but are also better at expressing their love for them. I could be wrong.<BR/><BR/>I have the impression that back in the day when our parents were growing up, their parents were more concerned with the basic necessities of life and had little time for anything else. It's been expressed to me that because of that they're unable to give love in a way that they never received it themselves. I think our generation has done a good job of overcoming that hindrance.Kevin Gilmorehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07689287179985777963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1212890428051515494.post-17392399142837766692008-06-05T12:57:00.000-05:002008-06-05T12:57:00.000-05:00Very interesting post, Kev.My father also has neve...Very interesting post, Kev.<BR/><BR/>My father also has never talked about his childhood, or any of his life with his children. He was a foster child.<BR/><BR/>However, my mother also rarely told of her childhood, and she had what could only be considered a normal childhood with two parents living in suburbia.<BR/><BR/>I had always hoped to learn more about my parents' lives as I and they got older, but they never really opened up about that subject, even when pressed. My mom has now passed away and my dad still rarely talks about those things.<BR/><BR/>I've concluded that it is probably a generational thing; parents of that generation didn't talk with their children about those things.<BR/><BR/>Unfortunately that leaves a sizable hole in our knowledge, understanding and recollection of our parents, especially after they're gone.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com