A Thank You
This is a continuation of a blog post I wrote today. You can find it here.
I began using a more critical eye in my future devotions, and soon found myself doubting the validity of some of what I was reading. Was this really from God, or was this actually Moses editorializing with the writing of God's laws? I thought, wow, Moses can pretty much tell his people anything he wants—that it's direct from God to him—and they don't question it.
I was well on my way to leaving the faith during Trump's first term. I had been jumping out and jumping in over the span of a few years. But when I saw the way Trump's supporters believed every one of his huge and ridiculous lies, I thought about the origins of my faith. I wondered, what if Moses were a Trump-like figure who would tell his people grandiose stories, and they would believe him? Could this religion of mine be built on something like that?
I thought about how a man could easily assemble the basic structure of a belief system and pass it off to the masses as a divine message directly from God. And along the way, men with agendas add to it so as to better control the masses with both a promise of eternal life and a threat of eternal damnation. It all seems so plausible.
That's when so much of my belief in Christianity began to fall away. Even though I had been open to new ideas and understandings, it was still a punch in the gut to realize I could no longer trust what I was reading in the scriptures.
Funnily enough, I have the MAGA movement to credit for my leaving Christianity. This isn't meant to guilt anyone, because I'm not mad at them. I'm thankful for their unwitting help. But in all honesty, I am a little sad that I no longer live in that world. I found comfort there, and I miss that.
I pray that you will come to see what so many of us have been trying to show you. That God is not with you in this.
Watching the horrors of a fascist government, masked and unidentified, terrorizing and snatching people off the streets in our neighborhoods, is not something I ever imagined I would see. It isn't just immigrants that they're targeting, either. They're taking children and citizens, people peacefully protesting, and veterans. They're taking school staff who are trying to protect their students, and they're taking moms as they pick up their kids from school. They're being excessively rough with people of all ages. It's out of control, and it needs to stop.
It's so disheartening to see large numbers of Christians cheer this disgusting behavior. If what we're witnessing is the fruits of their faith, it's sending a horrible message. But seeing them take this awful side just confirms for me that I made the correct decision in leaving Christianity. And that's the point of this blog post. I would rather have been wrong. I would rather have seen Christians standing arm in arm with us, protecting the refugee, the immigrant, and the downtrodden—the same people Jesus calls us to protect.
Siding with fascism is never the right thing to do.
I need to add that I do believe in a higher power, but I can't name it. It's my own personal belief system that works for me and evolves as I reflect on it over hours of contemplation. I like to say that I think we're all going to be surprised when we leave this life, because none of us can imagine what awaits us.
That's all I've got.
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