Friday, May 22, 2015

We Just Want What's Best For Her

Lots has been happening this past week for our family. My mom is in the Temporary Care Unit of Three Links Care Center in Northfield where she'll hopefully be for several more days or better yet, weeks. I say hopefully because there's a strong possibility that she'll be going home sooner than she should. She's still not strong enough to get around without help but she's determined to go back home and resume her life as she left it last Saturday.

I had been trying to get a hold of her Saturday morning but her phone was off the hook. I texted Tim (he lives with her) and he told me she wasn't feeling well; he suspected food poisoning. It concerned me because her health is frail to begin with and who knows how much her heart can take?

I was able to get in touch with Tracee and she offered to go over and check on her. It's a good thing she did. She rushed her to the emergency room at Ridges Hospital in Burnsville. Her heart was beating much too hard at 145 bpm, her blood pressure was dangerously high and her temperature was elevated. She was very dehydrated and some of the other values they check for were also out of range. She was in tough shape.

She spent the next few days at Ridges before being discharged to her room in Northfield where she remains.

As much as we'd like to see her remain there until she's better, the decision to leave or stay is up to her. The facility she's at has no ability to keep her from returning home no matter how weak or unable to care for herself she is.

We talked about getting her into an assisted living facility but she would need to be considerably stronger than she is for that to be an option. The other option we have is long term care or what's often referred to as a nursing home. It's not where we'd want to see her but it's a much safer environment than her home where I envision her sitting in front of the television watching Fox News and too weak to make it to the bathroom or kitchen without a huge effort on her part, say nothing of trying to bathe herself. It's very worrisome.

When all of this began to unfold we offered to take her in rather than having her return to her home but I began to have second thoughts about our offer. With Tammy's mother coming to stay with us next week, Tammy can't afford to have her back go out on her trying to lift my mother. With Tammy's fragile back, that's a real possibility and not a risk I want her to take.

This incident has weakened her quite a lot. I'm hopeful that she'll bounce back as she has in the past but that may be asking too much this time. This may be a new-normal that she's going to have to adjust to.

I want to say a special thank-you to Tracee for getting her to the hospital and quite likely saving her life. I don't think it can be overstated just how important it was that she received the medical care she did without any further delay last Saturday.

Also, a special thank-you to Tammy for putting in three full days with her making sure she was comfortable and easing her fears through it all.

I'm not sure how this will all unfold. We're working with a social worker to help us navigate these waters and discuss the options available to our mom. There's so much to consider and her options change as her health improves or declines and on the availability of rooms. We just want what's best for her.


David Bryan Gilmore said...

Glad to know she is doing better but sad to hear she is going back into the environment that didn't recognize her health crisis.

Kevin Gilmore said...

Yes, that's my concern and the concern of many of us. I only wish she would put her health concerns first before her concern for another.