Say What?

The youngest in our family, Tim, is gone. He died sometime late Wednesday or Thursday in his bed in the lower level townhome room he rented from a woman in Burnsville. There had been a falling out between Tim and most others in the family in the weeks leading up to our mother's death last September. He and I exchanged some harsh words back then and we hadn't spoken since August but the family came to his side when he recently received a diagnosis of stage 4 colon cancer. I wrote a few weeks ago about first learning of his cancer diagnosis in a post here that I only recently published a couple days ago. What follows is simply a collection of my thoughts about Tim's final weeks. I'm doing this for me. Tim was elusive in my life (and other's lives) and for me personally, I'm afraid to lose the few memories I have of him. These may not be the memories I'd prefer but it's what I have to work with. With my sister Jackie on the north end of the cities, i...

I don't suppose I can write a post here and not make mention of the shooting in Orlando, Florida early Sunday morning that killed 49 people at a nightclub frequented by LGBTQ people while injuring many more. Nobody can say for certain the motives behind the killer's actions but to right-wing media and Donald Trump*, it's clear that there can be no other explanation other than radical Islamic terrorism. More reasonable minds will wait to pass judgment and consider the killer's hatred of gays or his bipolar condition or even his possible unwillingness to come to grips with his own gay tendencies as contributing factors in his actions. I'm frustrated. We have a news media outlet here in the US called Fox News which is nothing more than a megaphone for our conservative wing of the government. It goes hand in hand with the many talk-radio stations that push the same conservative ideology along with a heavy dose of propaganda. Many decent people have come under their ...

My Google Calendar has never been more necessary to me. It's full of appointments, meetings, party reminders, and other notes to keep me on schedule. I was sort of looking forward to ditching my wristwatch when I retired and I pretty much have but for whatever reason, I'm finding the need for a personal secretary to keep my commitments straight and my calendar does a fine job of that. I didn't anticipate retirement being like this but I'm not complaining. We made it out to the Edina Art Fair last weekend and really enjoyed ourselves. This was one of several summer treats we had to take a pass on last year when Tammy's mother was staying with us. It was nice to be able to experience it again. We opted to catch the shuttle at Southdale Center for the drive into the event. The Uptown Art Fair in early August is our favorite of all the summer art fairs but this one is close to being just as good. Not as much glass art as we were hoping to see, though. Rachel came in...

My youngest brother, Tim, is dying of colon cancer and I'm feeling so bad for him. We had a falling out last summer when things became testy between us while our mother was living out her last months in a long-term care facility in Northfield. There were several of us who broke ties with Tim or was it Tim who moved on. Regardless, he needs us now. My sister Jackie has remained in sporadic contact with him and it was she that he confided in recently about the struggle he's in. She called me to pass along what he'd told her. I was out on a ride and listened while I pedaled along not quite sure of what to make of it and I'm ashamed to say, allowing our falling out to overshadow all of what Jackie was telling me. I returned my phone to my back jersey pocket, said a prayer for him and tried to find the rhythm I'd been enjoying before her call. But I kept thinking about Tim and what he might be going through and there's no way I could come anywhere close to apprecia...

We got our gardens planted just in time for some much-needed rain to welcome our flowers to their new home. It's always nice to have that work behind us. Tammy is a big help but once they're in the ground I'm pretty much on my own when it comes to tending to them. I don't mind—I find it relaxing to be out there putzing in the dirt. We've been enjoying our independence (I think I've mentioned that before here but it really is nice) and occasionally going out for a glass or two of wine or beer. It's nice but I'm finding that I have an allergy to the hops used in brewing beer, especially IPAs or those beers with higher IBUs . I have to be careful to order a beer with a lower IBU, preferably something less than 10 or I'll wake up with a pounding headache that will stay with me the entire day. When in doubt I'll reach for a Not Your Father's Root Beer. They're so good and they have an IBU of zero which begs the question: is it really beer? H...

Scott came into town from the east coast last week. Back in 1984, we were both working for the FAA in Huron, South Dakota at the Flight Service Station providing pilot weather briefings, filing flight plans and meeting the needs of the local flying community.  There were 3 golf courses in the city and 2 of them would become a main outlet of ours during the warmer months as we whiled away our time in exile, serving our penance for having come up short in our training at Minneapolis Center. Scott and I both joined the men's golf league which gathered one night each week at the main public course on the north side of town near the airport. I will never forget the first time we took the tee in front of at least a dozen others waiting their turn to do the same. Scott proceeded to hit at least 4 balls out of bounds before getting off the tee. It was an embarrassing moment that needed no words at the time. It could just as easily have been me. I made a passing mention of it when we ...

I wrote a blogpost a few weeks ago about concerns that I was being scammed. It turns out it was all legit. I received a check in the mail one week ago and promptly deposited it. Some friends were rightly suspicious and voiced their concerns to me on Facebook where their words had me 2nd guessing my decision to pursue the offer.  That little video clip I stitched together paid for my Crystal Lake golf membership for the year. What a deal! Speaking of which... I was on the golf course the other day and I couldn't help but notice how much I talk to myself when I'm out there—encouraging sorta stuff. I hit plenty of poor shots but I don't see any reason for berating myself. I sometimes see that in others and it doesn't seem to help. I quietly go about my business using a voice that's only audible to me as I discuss the options of my next shot. If my game's going poorly, I'll often remind myself that I'm golfing and I'm retired. What's not to lik...